There is a version of you that shows up when the room is safe. Good ideas. Remembers where the keys are. Says the right thing without rehearsing it first.

And there is the one that shows up after the meeting ran long and the house was too loud. Forgets things it knows perfectly well. Snaps at people it loves.

Same person. Two different states.

Your nervous system does not decide who you are. It decides what is available to you — your words, your memory, your patience, your empathy, your judgment. That availability changes hour by hour, and almost nobody is taught to read it. So we read it as character instead. Lazy. Scattered. Too sensitive. Difficult.

UNAVAILABLE is the field guide to the system underneath that.

It started as training material — notes for a session, then a handout, then a chapter that refused to stay a chapter. It ended up at over 350 pages across eight parts and 41 chapters.

What is inside?

State before skill. 

Why you cannot skill your way out of a state problem, and what to do first instead.

The Window of Access™. 

What narrows yours, what widens it, and how to work inside the one you have today.

The five states of protection. 

What each looks like in you specifically, rather than in a textbook.

Your early signals. 

Most people only recognise the third one. By then the options are gone.

The Six Reset Languages™. 

What settles one nervous system flattens another. Activated and depleted need different answers, and this is how you find yours.

Incl. 70 printable reset cards (Reset Languages™)

Different brains, same biology. 

How the same state shows up in opposite directions — more visible and externalised, or less visible and internalised.

The full toolkit. 

Sleep, food, breathing, cold exposure, grounding, medication, habits, burnout and bore-out — what holds up, what does not, and what depends entirely on your wiring.

Your own plan. 

Written while you can still think, for the version of you who cannot.

Digital edition · PDF and EPUB · 350+ pages · plus printable regulation cards and guide: "Back in Touch"- (how to be able to identify what's going on inside of me) ; instant download after purchase · read on any device, print any page.

Included in The Access Studio, my four-week course on neurodivergence and neuroinclusive design — delivered at the end of week four.

The printable field sheets that go with this book are free, and you do not need the book to use them. Twenty-four working sheets — early signals, reset languages, sleep, eating, the regulation blueprint, and a set of pocket cards.

This book is educational. It is not a diagnostic instrument and not a substitute for individual medical, psychiatric, or psychological care.